Touching And Being Touched
The following excerpt is from the online free read self help book, Be Your Own Therapist.
What happens when we meet a new friendly dog or cat? We tend to
stroke the animal, using our hands on its body. What usually
happens when we meet a new friendly person? Beyond a perfunctory
handshake, we avoid touching. Why the difference? What would it
be like to stroke a newly met person for the length of time one
might stroke a newly met dog? What would such strokes look like?
Our reluctance to touch stems from ingrained cultural training
that such touching would be considered sexual in nature. Yet we
all have seen films of our ape cousins grooming each other for
hours without a trace of evident lust.
Growth Tip. Fantasize (or visualize) for a few moments meeting a
new person and stroking that person's body as you would a newly
met friendly cat or dog. How does that feel? Is it OK with you?
(I am not suggesting you do this to a stranger.) Fantasize doing
that often to a spouse/ significant-other when they end their
workday. Do you want them to reciprocate?
|Our ape/chimp cousins do a lot of touching; we would have a happier healthier society if we also touched each other more.|
Men, seemingly more than women, have been adversely affected by
the cultural prohibition against touch, particularly the
prohibition against touching another man. It is a significant
growth experience for many men to finally find the courage to
hug another man for the first time, discovering that there can
be emotional caring without sexual feelings.
Do you touch enough? Under what circumstances and with whom do
you want more? What is stopping you from touching and being
touched more often? Our society historically has touched far too
little. One of the many reasons why the crime of sexual abuse
occurs so often is that adult perpetrators are trying to
compensate for lack of childhood or present-day touch. It has
been said that we all need 8-12 meaningful touches a day. Are
you giving and receiving that amount or more?
Reminder: Moderately vigorous exercise is a natural way to boost your pituitary's output of HGH Human Growth Hormone.
|Ignore your body; then enjoy all the wonders of modern medicine such as cancer operations and heart bypasses.
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